INCLUDING AMONGST OTHER THINGS HOMER SIMPSON AND SPIDERMAN

And they called it puppy pizza love.

POOCH STARTS BLAZE. A pizza loving pooch set fire to its owner's home after switching on an hob trying to get a bite of its favourite cheesy snack.

The Staffordshire bull terrier had jumped up to try to get at the pizza which had been left on top of the oven when it knocked one of its knobs, a spokeswoman for Staffordshire Fire and Rescue Service said. - The Sun (24/01/2012)

On yer bike!

BRITAIN'S ONLY TANDEM HEARSE IS UP FOR SALE. Britain's only tandem bicycle hearse has been put up for sale as its Reverend owner Paul Sinclair claims he's no longer fit enough to ride it up hill.

Although the novel idea has been popular among cycling enthusiasts and the environmentally friendly, Rev Sinclair and his wife Marian are just not up to long bike rides anymore and have struggled to find locals willing to take up their job. - Emily Hewett, The Metro (25/01/2012)

How this fairy made a whole theatre audience disappear.

A pantomime fairy appeared on stage in a puff of smoke and set off a fire alarm, causing the evacuation of Dormston Mill Theatre. - The Telegraph.

D'oh!!!!!!

SIMPSON FANS BID THOUSANDS FOR BIT OF GLUE. A 1cm piece of dried glue (pictured right) that vaguely resembles Homer Simpson (shown left) is attracting bids of over £2000 on E-Bay.

Seller Christopher Herbert, from London, noticed its uncanny resemblance to the balding character, and listed it on the auction site as 'the missing piece in any Simpsons fans collection. - Emma Gritt, The Metro (26/01/2012)

And so onto another cartoon character.

SPIDERMAN BURGLAR STRIKES. CCTV captures a burglar conducting a Spiderman-style break-in at a supermarket by cutting a hole in the roof and abseiling down a rope into the store, from where £10,000 of cigarettes and alcohol were then stolen. - The Telegraph (29/01/2012) Click on article link to see video footage.

Does this look dangerous to you?

HAGGIS CAUSES SECURITY ALERT. British Transport Police were called to a train station in Inverness, Scotland, after worried railway staff identified a model haggis dressed in a tartan kilt as a possible security threat.

The unaccompanied papier-mache haggis was put on a train at Kirkcaldy in Fife from where it travelled for over three hours and across 114 miles to its final destination.Staff failed to see the funny side of the stunt and called in British Transport Police officials who were waiting for the package when it arrived.

The haggis, believed to have been part of a student art project, caused a major security breach when it arrived in Inverness later that day. - Mark Molloy, The Metro (26/01/2012)

Another case of 'health and safety' overcoming commonsense?

SHOPPER TRAPPED IN LIFT BECAUSE STAFF WERE NOT QUALIFIED TO PRESS A BUTTON. Shopper Janice Woodward spent 75 minutes trapped in a supermarket lift with her granddaughter after health and safety rules stopped staff pushing a button to rescue them, it is claimed.

Although staff attended the emergency they couldn't touch a control button to release the lift because they weren't qualified.

Instead Mrs Woodward said a trained technician was called out and he simply pressed the same button to free them - and hour and 15 minutes later. - The Telegraph (28/01/2012)

And now for something for all you crafty bloggers out there.

CLEANER KNITS HER CO-WORKERS. Keen knitter Sue Ball has called on her hobby to create 25cm (10in) woollen dolls of garden staff at Paignton Zoo, where she works as a cleaner.

Ms Ball, who has been knitting for 30 years, said: ‘This is the first time I’ve made figures. I saw a pattern for a knitted Father Christmas and I thought it looked like one of my colleagues, so I was inspired.’

Bill Corner clutches a chainsaw next to his woollen miniature (Picture: APEX)

Her attention to detail was so great that some of the figures she has created so far come complete with uniforms, badges and work tools. - Tariq Tahir, The Metro (26/01/2012) 

And lastly, my favourite article of the week ......

Now I'm just as annoyed by those dog owners who let their pets foul the pavements and, worse still, children's play areas BUT part of me can't help but wonder if this is a step too far.

NIGHT VISION GOGGLES USED TO SPOT DOGGY DOO. Undercover wardens are using night vision goggles to identify and fine pet owners who allow their dogs to foul in public places.

The sophisticated espionage equipment has been issued to council workers so they can catch dog walkers who believe they can get away with not gathering up their pets’ mess at night. - Murray Wardrop, The Telegraph (29/01/2012)

As always wherever possible I will endeavour to bring you the links to articles I have used in my Media Monday posts but this is not always possible.