22 Oct 2014

THE BINDING CHAIR.

THE BINDING CHAIR {Also published as The Binding Chair: A Visit From The Foot Emancipation Society} by KATHRYN HARRISON.

SOURCE: A re-read off our shelves.

BACK COVER BLURB: The magical tale of a young orphan's adventures after she flees rural China for turn-of-the-century Shanghai.
- Read more here.

FIRST SENTENCE {Apprenticeship}: The gatepost, stuccoed pink to match the villa, bore a glazed tile painted with a blue number, the same as that in the advertisement.

MEMORABLE MOMENT {Page 41}: She'd learn never to move her skirt while sitting, never to move her legs while lying down, and never to wash her feet in the same basin as her face - otherwise she would be reborn as a pig.

MY THOUGHTS: Last read a number of years ago I decided to re-read this in order to decide whether or not I wanted to keep it/ pass it on/donate it to a charity shop.

Sadly not a novel I enjoyed second time around. I don't know whether my tastes have changed since I last read it or that at the time we had plenty of shelf space and I wasn't so strict with myself as to only keep books I knew I'd re-read at some point in time.

Whilst at heart a story of China The Binding Chair isn't written by a Chinese author. Not that this usually matters, after all how many paranormal novels are written by vampires, werewolves or the like? Its just that I felt the author did not write with authority or for that matter much conviction.

Not so much a confusing read as what I'd describe as a fragmented one. I'm afraid the to-ing and fro-ing between decades and cities not to mention main characters, May, and her niece/surrogate child, Alice, made for a disjointed story. 

A story of obsessions, of what it is to be beautiful, of the sometimes perverse nature of man's desire - the author makes a great (and very graphic) deal of how erotically enticing May's English husband (and her Chinese father before him) found her (and her mother's) bound feet - whilst the book does go some way in exploring the cost to women I'm afraid for me much was eclipsed by the fact that at times it felt as if the author relied too heavily on shock tactics where none were needed.



21 Oct 2014

FROM SLEEPING ONES TO POLKADOT ONESIE WEARING ONES BY WAY OF AGGRESSIVE MOPPING ONES IN A MONDAY MEDIA 'CRIME' SPECIAL.

WARNING: Whilst I endeavour to keep Media Monday fairly family friendly I feel it only right to let you know that some of the articles featured do contain links to articles that may contain more adult material. TT
 'Goldilocks burglar asleep in elderly couple's bed'. An retired Burnley couple returned from holiday to find what has been described as the most domesticated burglar imaginable asleep in their bed. Alarmed to find three bowls of porridge a pasta dinner prepared in the kitchen and a tub half full of bubbles in the bathroom the pair discovered the thief snoozing under the covers. 

The news from across the pond and my favourite articles of the week ..... 'Man arrested for taking cleaner's mop and aggressively mopping hotel floor'. A 30 year old US man has been arrested when after spotting a hotel employee he thought was doing a poor job of cleaning the floor he grabbed the mop and becoming aggressive mopped over the employee's shoes several times.


'Cock-a-doodle-to-do! Noisy cockerel slapped with ASBO after crowing complaints'. A noisy cockerel has been slapped with an ASBO (Anti Social Behaviour Order generally given to a person who has been found to have been engaged in anti-social behaviour) following his disturbing a sleepy Peak District village.


 'Inflatable crocodile sparks police scare'. Plymouth police and wildlife experts from Dartmoor zoo were called to reports of an escaped 3ft crocodile in a women's back garden - only to find it was an inflatable toy.

'Cannabis-eating sheep get high as kite after munching £4,000 worth of drugs'. By the time she had realised what she thought were bags of rubbish were in fact bags of the Class B drug a Surrey farmer's sheep had munched their way through £4,000 of the illegal plant.

'Police hunt thieves pictured in polkadot onesie and red leggings armed with a spade and lightsabre'. In a FaceBook post British Transport Police police officers admit it's a rarity thieves are pictured in such bizarre attire but nonetheless believe their clothing to be crucial identifying features.


20 Oct 2014

MY BUCKET LIST.

Bucket List: A list of things to do before you die 
- Urban Dictionary

Or as I prefer to think of it ...

A number of experiences or achievements that a person hopes to have or accomplish during their lifetime - Oxford Dictionaries.

Hosted by Sherry Ellis over at Mama Diaries today I'm delighted to be participating in .....



Milk a goat. Don't ask, its just something I'd always wanted to do. 

Have my hair restyled. Not a biggie but given the fact that up until my mid-teens I could sit on my hair (I can still see my mam sat there crying as the hairdresser made that first cut), that I'm indecisive, and am too lazy would rather take time out to read than style my hair (a major thing in deciding on a cut) it was a big thing to me. 

Two done. In no particular order, six to go .....

Plan my tattoo. (Notice I don't write get a tattoo). A big fan of what Mr T thinks of as trashy tv (Big Brother, Storage Hunters, Lizard Lick Towing to name but three) my latest discovery is Tattoos After Dark. Love them or loathe them I defy anyone to watch this show and not see tattoos such as this four wise monkeys tattoo as works of art, the skin the canvas.

Go Paint-balling. I know reliant on crutches/Madge (my trusty electric wheelchair) as I am this doesn't sound like the best of ideas BUT here is what I have in mind. I'd be the only one with a paint gun, everyone would stand still making my hitting them much more likely. Funnily enough not something either Mr T or any of our friends are up for though I can't for the life of me think why not.

Live in a hobbit hole just like Bilbo Baggins. Of all the things on my list the least likely to happen but, hey, I can dream. 

Visit our local coast more often. Only a 20 or so minute metro ride away, I love Sunday afternoons spent with Mr T at Tynemouth with its dramatic coast, amazing priory and castle and great week-end market which sees lots of books on offer, followed by fish n chips (eaten al fresco of course) and a trundle along the coast to Whitley Bay.


Tynemouth Priory. Copyright: Urszula Piotrowska.

To start BEE (BookExpo England). Of course we have literary festivals here in England, indeed we have the Durham Book Festival (a ten minute train ride away) every October but it seems to me that none, no, not even the Hay Festival, can compare to BEA (BookExpo America) and as I'm not likely to ever get there I've decided the thing to do is to bring it to the UK. 

Visit Neuschwanstein Castle. As a girl I loved fairy tales and whilst the whole princess kissing a frog who turned into prince never really appealed, the places did. Oh, to run down those stairs, loosing my glass slipper as I did so (sighs), to be locked in that tower room, letting down my long golden hair, to be eating lumps out of the gingerbread house, to visit granny in her woodland abode - its hardly any wonder that the castle on which it is said Cinderella's castle is modelled features on my Bucket List.

Well, that's me done. How does your Bucket List look? Be sure to stop over and take a look at what's on Sherry's list. 


19 Oct 2014

A TALE OF ONE WOMANS SPAM.

From business proposals {2} to proposals of a very different kind. I've been offered everything from Viagra {4} which lets face it I'm probably going to need if I accept any of the half dozen or so beautiful, single, Russian girls {5} awaiting my introduction, not to mention 'Natie' who apparently is in need of a strong, virile man {2} or Web35 in search of man {1}.  

I've been made offers of car insurance {6}. Something I'm probably in need of more than most given my alcohol problem. Not that there aren't people out there, people who can help with rehab {2}/detox {1} in much the same way as there are those reaching out to help me with my incontinence {8} or for that matter my ADHD symptoms {7} or, indeed, my gambling addiction {1} made much worse by all those casinos offering 'red carpet treatment' {3}. 

That's of course presuming I care to take someone up on their kind offer of low income social housing {2} complete with a free economic, environmentally friendly boiler .... if I'm eligible {4} and my $6 fashion jumper {1} doesn't do the job and keep me warm. Not that I'll be needing any of this given the number of credit cards I'm entitled to {6}. Oh, that and the fact that I've decided that cheap flights {2} out of the country are a viable option, something made all the more tempting by the offer of seats with more leg room {3}.

And that my friends is my spam box today.