EWE HAVE TO BE JOKING!

How BAArmy is this?

SHEEP PLACENTA COMBATS WRINKLES. An alternative to a face-lift has been invented by a Harley Street doctor - using sheep placenta instead of surgery. - Andrew Dagnell, News Of The World (03/07/2011)

Looking for an unusual music venue?

GARDEN SHED HOSTS CONCERTS. Jon Earl films bands playing in the ramshackle First World War billet and the shows have become an internet hit.

Artists such as Steve Harley, Dave Rotheray of The Beautiful South and US singer Pokey LaFarge have performed in the 8ft by 10ft wooden shack in Clevedon, Somerset, since the recordings began 18 months ago. - Martin Fricker, The Mirror (04/07/2011)

Personally I much prefer my sarnies freshly made.

THE 'GAS-FLUSHED SANDWICH ..... That stays fresh for 14 days. The food and drink wholesaler, Booker, is launching chicken tikka and cheese ploughmans sandwiches, among others, it insists will remain fresh for 14 days.

The secret behind the sandwich's anti-ageing is a process of gas flushing, food technician Boggiano explained, where oxygen is replaced by CO2 and nitrogen as part of the protective atmosphere packaging. - Terri Judd, The Independent (05/07/2011)

Missing .......

CHARLIE CHAPLIN SCARECROW. Wanted posters have gone up after a charlie Chaplin exhibit from a scarecrow competition went missing. 

Audrey Woods, the scarecrow competition organiser, said “Mr Chaplin was last seen wearing a black suit, white shirt, a black tie and a bowler hat with a pair of big black boots.

“I think it was once a child’s suit, so if we can’t find Mr Chaplin we will be looking for a short, well-dressed man with a big feet. - Chris Fay, The Northern Echo (07/07/2011)

'Shandygate' .....

MAJOR BANNED FROM 28 PUBS all because of a dispute over how to make shandy. Councillor Tony Cooke wanted the beer poured first, but the landlord of the Beaconsfield Hotel said it would fizz over if the lemonade didn't go in before the beer. - The Teesdale Mercury (07/07/2011)

All the fun of the fair? Another case of 'elf' and safety gone mad.

WET SPONGES BANNED. Carnival organisers banned a wet-sponge throwing stall for health and safety reasons. Sponges were replaced with super-soaker water pistols. The Telegraph (08/07/2011)

Footballer David Beckham and his wife Victoria have named their 4th child. Yes, another 'celeb' baby gets an, err, unusual name.

SONS BROOKLYN, ROMEO AND CRUZ EXCITED TO MEET THEIR NEW SISTER .... Harper Seven.

The seven in the name is believed to be a reference to David's football number when he played for Manchester United and England, while the Harper could be referring to Harper's Bazaar magazine or perhaps To Kill A Mocking Bird author Harper Lee.*- Liz Thomas & Sarah Bull, The Mail (11/07/2011)

* Another 'star' who claims not to have read a book, my money is on the baby being named after the magazine.

PLEASE NOTE:  Wherever possible I will endeavour to bring you the links to articles I have used in my Media Monday posts but this is not always possible.