DEATH BY BUTTER.

THE TELEGRAPH.

What a mistake to make.

BBC TEAM STALK THE WRONG MAN. A BBC Panaroma investigation into an alleged stalker ended in farce when the team spent a week pursuing the wrong man. - Anita Singh, 31/01/2011.

And here was me thinking it was one of those urban myths.

It's one of those moments that you pray never happens - having your mobile phone go off during a funeral service.

But one mourner at a church in East Sussex had cause to be doubly embarrassed recently, when his handset shattered the solemn atmosphere with the rather unfortunate choice of ringtone - the Bee Gees hit Staying Alive.

The Reverend Martin Morgan, who was taking the service said "It took a while before people realised what the song was and then, fortunately, most people found it quite funny." -05/02/2011.

Question: What should not be stapled to an exam paper.

Answer: The answers.

Manchester University has apologised to students after exam papers were handed out with the answers stapled to the back.

The mistake was spotted by a student who told the invigilators, who then removed the sheets prompting some of the geology students to walk out.

One student said: "Some people didn't realise they had the answers and were angry that others had been given (the opportunity to cheat) an unfair advantage."

The exam will be taken again. - Robert Mendick, 06/02/2011.

THE DAILY MAIL.

FARMER FACES JAIL AFTER DRESSING AS AN AXEMAN. Wielding a four foot axe, a couple, driven to distraction by unruly yobs, staged an axe attack.

Covered in tomato ketchup and looking terrified, Lucy Walton banged on the youngsters car window screaming "Let me in, let me in" as her fiance, John Powell, chased her with the axe.

Unfortunately, although the teenagers took fright at the blood-curdling scene as planned, they then called the police and Mr Powell faces a jail sentence. - James Tozer, 04/02/2011.

THE GUARDIAN.

Not just for Harry Potter, it's for real ........

UNIVERSITY OF BIRMINGHAM SCIENTISTS HAVE BUILT AN INVISIBILITY CLOAK. It might not work as well as Harry Potter's but scientists have built an invisibility cloak that makes every day objects vanish by bending light to fool the eye.

The cloak - a lump of crystal rather than a flowing cape - exploits the natural light-bending properties of calcite, a transparent glass-like crystal, so that an object placed under it is hidden by what appears to be a flat, featureless surface.

(At present only able to ) hide small objects, such as pins and paperclips, (it is hoped that it will) pave the way for more sophisticated devices that are capable of hiding much larger (schoolboy sized?) objects. - Ian Sample, 02/02/2011.

YAHOO NEWS.

The perfect murder? I once read a crime novel in which a wife murdered her husband using ground-up tiger whiskers which were supposedly undetectable during a postmortem - surely much more readily available is the murder 'weapon' used by these two?

 MAN MURDERED WITH BUTTER. A Sicilian couple thought they had the perfect weapon to get rid of her ex-husband -- a slab of butter which would melt after they asphyxiated him. - 05/02/2011.

Thanks to Husband dearest for the above article. I'm surprised he brought it to my attention for fear it might give me ideas.

PLEASE NOTE - I Will always endeavour to bring you the links to articles I have used in my Media Monday posts but this is not always possible.