I'd always presumed the song The Twelve Days Of Christmas was the twelve days before Christmas. Seems I was mistaken.
Beginning on the 25th of December and running until January 5th though some traditions have it beginning the eve of December 25th (the first day of Christmas being the 26th) until the 6th of January.
Usually seen as a nonsense song with secular origins it has however been suggested that it is a sixteenth century instructional piece with hidden references to the basic teachings of the Christian Church, a device to teach the catechism to children, the true love of the song not an earthly suitor but a reference to God himself.
The ...
Partridge in a pear tree .... Jesus
Two turtle doves ............. The Old and New Testaments of the bible
Three french hens ........... The three virtues
Four calling birds ............. The gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John
Five gold rings ................. The first five books of the Old Testament
Six geese-a-laying ............ The six days of creation
Seven swans-a-swimming .. The seven gifts of the Holy Spirit
Eight maids-a-milking ........ The eight Beatitudes
Nine ladies ladies dancing ... The nine fruits of the Holy Spirit
Ten lords-a-leaping ............. The ten commandments
Eleven piper piping .............. The eleven Faithful Disciples
Twelve drummers drumming . The twelve points of the doctrine in the Apostles' Creed.
Anyway, whether a mnemonic device to teach children OR simply a nonsense song I thought I'd do my own version using the actual contents of my spam box .... if not exactly in these numbers.
On the first day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
incontinence pads should I wee.
On the second day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the third day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
three calendars of naked firemen
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the fourth day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
four x-rated movies
three calendars of naked fireman
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the fifth day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
five cheap car leases
four x-rated movies
three calendars of naked fireman
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the sixth day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
six detox facilities
five cheap car leases
four x-rated movies
three calendars of naked firemen
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the seventh day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
seven bank accounts hacked
six detox facilities
five cheap car leases
four movies of the adult kind
three calendars of naked firemen
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the eighth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me
eight credit card application forms
seven bank accounts
six detox facilities
five cheap car leases
four x-rated movies
three calendars of naked firemen
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the ninth day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
nine herbal pills for slimming
eight credit card application forms
seven bank accounts hacked
six detox facilities
five cheap car leases
four x-rated movies
three calendars of naked firemen
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the tenth day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
ten Lapland holidays
nine herbal pills for slimming
eight credit card application forms
seven bank accounts hacked
six detox facilities
five cheap car leases
four x-rated movies
three calendars of naked firemen
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the eleventh day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
eleven sexy Santa suits
ten Lapland holidays
nine herbal pills for slimming
eight credit card application forms
seven bank accounts hacked
six detox facilities
five cheap car leases
four x-rated movies
three calendars of naked firemen
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
On the twelfth day of Christmas
my spam box had for me
twelve Boxing Day sale promotions
eleven sexy Santa suits
ten Lapland holidays
nine herbal pills for slimming
eight credit card application forms
seven bank accounts hacked
six detox facilities
five cheap car leases
four x-rated movies
three calendars of naked firemen
two Russian women looking for love
and incontinence pads should I wee.
HAPPY HOLIDAY