19 Oct 2014

A TALE OF ONE WOMANS SPAM.

From business proposals {2} to proposals of a very different kind. I've been offered everything from Viagra {4} which lets face it I'm probably going to need if I accept any of the half dozen or so beautiful, single, Russian girls {5} awaiting my introduction, not to mention 'Natie' who apparently is in need of a strong, virile man {2} or Web35 in search of man {1}.  

I've been made offers of car insurance {6}. Something I'm probably in need of more than most given my alcohol problem. Not that there aren't people out there, people who can help with rehab {2}/detox {1} in much the same way as there are those reaching out to help me with my incontinence {8} or for that matter my ADHD symptoms {7} or, indeed, my gambling addiction {1} made much worse by all those casinos offering 'red carpet treatment' {3}. 

That's of course presuming I care to take someone up on their kind offer of low income social housing {2} complete with a free economic, environmentally friendly boiler .... if I'm eligible {4} and my $6 fashion jumper {1} doesn't do the job and keep me warm. Not that I'll be needing any of this given the number of credit cards I'm entitled to {6}. Oh, that and the fact that I've decided that cheap flights {2} out of the country are a viable option, something made all the more tempting by the offer of seats with more leg room {3}.

And that my friends is my spam box today.




9 comments:

Stephanie Faris said...

I am SO glad that spam filters catch these things. I rarely even see what's in my spam folder anymore. It just occasionally catches things it shouldn't, so I have to go fishing!

Nas said...

Oh! Fun! I receive exactly same things in my spam folder which I keep clearing so I can easily find something caught there which could be of importance!

Kimberly @ On the Wings of Books said...

Wow that's a lot of spam! I actually use two emails just to avoid spam. One regular and a yahoo one that I use when I'm unsure of the source.

Suko said...

Dang! That's a lot of Spam! At least you turned the Spam into something good--a humorous post. :)

Brian Joseph said...

At least your spam is coherent. So much of mine seems to be incomprehensible gibberish.

I am not one hundred percent sure what the purpose of all this is. I suspect it is generated by computers trying to get people to click on a link.

Kelly said...

Ha! I don't check my SPAM box very often and I hope I don't miss the occasional "real" mail that makes its way in there.

Maybe I need to go take a peek....

L.G. Keltner said...

That's a beautiful castle! I've always had a thing for castles! They're so beautiful and put me in the mood for a good adventure.

Literary Feline said...

Spam can be a great source of laughter sometimes. :-)

The worst I got though was actually kind of scary. The e-mail said a hit was put on my life and for half of what the person who wanted me dead had paid, the e-mailer wouldn't kill me. I ended up reporting it to the authorities even though I knew it wasn't legit. I can see someone being taken by that kind of scam so easily.

Tracy Terry said...

Welcome to LG Keltner.

Not just a days worth of spam as I might have implied, I'm afraid like Kelly I tend to let mine accumulate and this was several days worth.

How awful was that Literary Feline, so scary. I once got an email saying a previously unknown relative of Mr T's had died leaving us millions. We ONLY had to send our bank details along with any passwords and so much in pounds (I can't remember the amount) in order that they could process things.