20 May 2013

VORTEX ESCAPING WORMS, DEFLATED DUCKS AND MORE.

A portal to other times, places and dimensions, really? A concerned Brighton resident out walking his dog claims to have 'noticed' the opening of a giant wormhole or vortex which 'on closer inspection seems to be the opening to be some kind of portal to other times, places and dimensions' that a week later 'seems to have got worse – it is now emitting an unsettling yellow light and a large snake appears to be emerging from the wall.’ MORE

How romantic ..... A man who did not so much forget his wife's 40th birthday as 'ran out of time and did not meet her expectations' has avoided her wrath by placing a whole page ad in his local paper saying simply 'I Love You - R'. MORE

The most unlikely getaway vehicle ever. Police are trying to track down an elderly gentleman who they believe can help with their enquiries. Captured on CCTV in a Portsmouth supermarket he was last seen making his getaway at 4mph in a mobility scooter. MORE

And meanwhile ...... The Military of Defence has launched an urgent appeal to  find two men photographed walking in Dorset with what were thought to be two unexploded bombs on their shoulders. MORE

Whoops! That's an embarrassing expensive mistake to make. The owner of a brand new Porsche has been left counting the cost of a gear mistake after crashing his car into a discount supermarket. Staff at the Aldi store in Cardigan, west Wales, said the unlucky driver thought his luxury sports vehicle was in reverse when he attempted to pull out of a parking bay - but instead drove ahead into a fire escape. MORE

Favourite article of the week .....  Star Wars fans and Doctor Who fans had to be separated by police after a brawl threatened to break out at a special sci-fi convention. MORE (I bet the Star War fans were hoping the Force would be with them. PW)


Remember my mentioning the giant rubber duck floating down the Times? Well ..... The world famous duck has been found deflated in the Victoria Harbour in Hong Kong and whilst no one is quite sure what caused the massive yellow duck to lose all of its air rumours have been circulating as to the cause of the duck’s demise. (I personally think it was fowl play. PW) MORE



To be demolished because its 75 centimetres too wide? Rowley Arts Centre, a partly built £7 million cinema complex in Cambridgeshire, has to be knocked down after it was ruled that at 75 centimetres too wide it was too close too neighbouring houses. MORE

You don't say ....... After a man was found stuck in a baby's high-chair in one of its Irish fast food restaurants a McDonald's spokesperson had this to say "“McDonald’s is aware of the incident involving a customer who decided to sit in one of our children’s high-chairs in Winthrop Street – and as you can see, we recommend that children don’t use the high-chair without adult supervision!” MORE

Why its never a good idea to eat when stealing from someone's home ......  Having stopped for some Jaffa Cakes and a pasta meal a burglar was spotted at the home of an elderly couple and neighbours contacted the police. Denying that he had committed the crime, forensic experts found imprints of his fingers on the Jaffa Cake box which meant the evidence 'literally pointed' at him. MORE

And if being caught out by a Jaffa Cake wasn't embarrassing enough how about ...... A Cardiff burglar was arrested after a hero literally caught him by his trousers. The burglar having wriggled out of his trousers and fled in his underpants was later arrested after being identified by his DNA. MORE



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9 comments:

Suko said...

It must be Monday! Thank you for the early morning laughs. The updated, deflated duck story is perhaps my favorite this week. The whole idea of a massive yellow duck is just so absurd!

Kelly said...

An exceptionally funny collection this week, Tracy. I was hoping the link on the first story might actually have a photo of his perceived "wormhole". ;)

Yvonne@fiction-books said...

Hi Tracy,

I have been telling hubbie about your eclectic Monday posts and we have both been consciously scouring the more obscure news items to try and keep up with might Monday's might reveal ... But still you manage to outwit us and sneak something in that we didn't notice!!

The story about the Arts Centre just about took the biscuit! and I shall never sneak another Jaffa Cake again, without thinking of that sweet-toothed burglar!

A good belly laugh as always, thanks.

Yvonne

Shooting Stars Mag said...

Oh wow, Star Wars and Doctor Who fans fighting? The dork world certainly gets heated sometimes. hah It's all about love people!

Nikki-ann said...

Hehe... I love these! This time, the only one I've heard of is the sci-fi convention one :)

Melissa (Books and Things) said...

Oh these are a good collection of stories. Poor ducky tho!

Stephanie@Fairday's Blog said...

I guess we can't get away from our DNA.

I have the most hilarious image in my mind of the man in the high chair!

Thanks for sharing!

Brandi Kosiner said...

ha, love the ducky picture

Naida said...

You crack me up Tracy and that giant rubber duck gives me the chills! For some reason that looks nightmarish.
lol about the fight with the Star Wars fans and Doctor Who fans !