22 Sep 2010

THE SECRET LIFE OF A SLUMMY MUMMY.

THE SECRET LIFE OF A SLUMMY MUMMY by FIONA NEILL.

For Lucy Sweeney, motherhood isn't all astanga yoga and Cath Kidston prints. It's been years since the dirty laundry pile was less than a metre high, months since Lucy remembered to have sex with her husband, and a week since she last did the school run wearing pyjamas.

Motherhood, it seems, has more pitfalls than she might have expected. Caught between perfectionist Yummy Mummy No 1 and hypercompetitive Alpha Mum, Lucy is in danger of losing the parenting plot. And worst of all she's alarmingly distracted by Sexy Domesticated Dad. It's only a matter of time before the dirty laundry quite literally blows up in her face ....

.... From the outer back cover.

FIRST SENTENCE: I leave my contact lenses to soak overnight in a coffee cup and wake up in the morning to discover that Husband on a Short Fuse has drunk them in the night.

MEMORABLE MOMENT: "Once upon a time, middle-aged men blew their cover by calling trousers slacks and referring to all women under sixty as girls now all it takes is writing a text message in long hand."

I thought this would be a quick read, something I could easily delve into between hospital visits - wrong! I found myself reluctant to pick it up at all and could only manage to read a few pages at a time before becoming bored by it all.

With no real story as such and characters I failed to identify with, Slummy Mummy seemed more like a collection of memories put together as opposed to a novel.

Filled with stereotypical and predictable characters - yes, they were all there, the glamorous mother, the mother who takes her children to school wearing a coat over her pyjamas and the token, handsome father - the only one of any interest was Joe, a five year old who has a fixation with David Bowie's Major Tom, he comes out with some great things ......
 
(Told he is suffering from growing pains) "How do you know it isn't shrinking pains? Granny is smaller than she used to be. By the morning I will be so small you won't be able to see me any more" he said, his voice getting quieter and quieter. "And then I might get eaten by a dog on the way to school."

Riddled with urban myths (has anyone ever really put on yesterdays clothes only to discover, hours later, yesterdays underwear still in there, poking out the bottom of their trouser leg? I thought not) and cultural 'in jokes' that anyone outside of England would find difficult to understand and certainly wouldn't appreciate this is not a book I would personally recommend.

The Secret Life Of A Slummy Mummy came free with SHE magazine.

17 comments:

Vince said...

An aerodynamic work then.

chitra said...

Your review would help the readers to choose well what to read or not.

Mary said...

I have the 50 page rule - toss it if you aren't loving it by page 50 (sometimes I'll stretch it to 100 pages if it's a big book).

Clarissa Draper said...

Oh, that's too bad. The title looked so promising.

CD

R. Ramesh said...

ya chitra said it right: Your review would help the readers to choose well what to read or not.

SG said...

Nice review. It emphasize the fact that don't judge a book by its title.

GMR said...

Ooh, goodness...it sounds like this one was almost painful to read. Can't say it would be one I'd pick up (even before your review) as the title and cover do nothing for me. Seeing as the cons are adding up to more than the pros, it might be best if I skip this one. Thanks for the inside scoop!

StarTraci said...

Well it almost seems worth it to read about a five year old with a Bowie/Major Tom obsession (that might be my 30 year crush on him speaking, however) but the description of the hidden underwear in yesterday's clothes is enough to sway me WAY away from this book.

Thanks for the review.

:-)
Traci

Suko said...

Petty, thanks for your honest review. :)

Kelly said...

Probably not a book for me, but I did laugh at the first line!

Vivienne said...

I imagine that like me your taste in books has changed since my blog came to life. I used to enjoy books like this, but they don't do anything for me anymore.

Though say that,the lines you quoted made me laugh.

tattytiara said...

Honestly? That has happened to me with socks - more than once!

Jen said...

I am ashamed to admit I have been guilty of the coat over pajamas...

kavita said...

No wonder it came free with the magazine !Thanks for the review .

brandileigh2003 said...

Thanks for the honest review!

Brandi from Blkosiner’s Book Blog

Bonnie said...

Oh dear, I was planning to pick up Slummy Mummy that I keep seeing at the yard sale. Perhaps there's a reason why it never gets sold?

Jenners said...

Well, I guess when a book comes free with a magazine, you need to lower your expectations! : )

I did like the excerpt you shared ... that was really cute.